Time Warp
“Six o’clock, winter”, by John Sloan (1912)
“Sunday”, by Edward Hopper (1926)
Time has been playing tricks on my mind lately.
After many unsuccessful attempts, I finally managed to get a ticket to the Phillips Collection in D.C. last week. It was the first real art gallery that I’ve been to in over a year and it was marvelous! God, I’ve missed galleries and museums so much. This was quite a collection and, having had no idea who Duncan Phillips was, I was excited to learn about his advocacy for the importance of art, especially in times of unrest/tragedy - an idea that seems pretty relevant right now. Isn’t it amazing when people with power and influence and wealth use all of that for good?!
One small corner of the collection grabbed my attention; the two paintings above, placed side by side in a tiny room off of the main pathway through the old house which constitutes the gallery. The hustle and bustle of Sloan’s picture, which feels so nostalgic of pre-pandemic life, next to the quiet solitude typical of Hopper’s work, is really striking, especially in light of the year that we have had. Thinking about these paintings has given me pause for reflection on what a time this has been, and how much life has changed - in all ways.
Another funny (if slightly jarring) experience while visiting the Phillips Collection for me, was seeing a painting for the second time that I had previously seen over ten years ago at the National Gallery in London. I remember originally looking at the painting in question - Picasso’s “The Blue Room” - at the height of my Picasso mania, when I was 18 or 19 years old, just moved to London and feeling newly free and independent and grown-up. I didn’t know it was going to be at the Phillips Collection and when I suddenly spotted the painting, I felt completely transported back to the person that I was then… such a bizarre feeling, and confusing to try and connect that time to the life that I live now. I suppose I am getting to the age where I should expect to see paintings again that I have seen elsewhere, in another life, so this is perhaps something to get used to. It’s the same feeling as when certain music or smells evoke memories in such a realistic way, but I think there is something rather special and rare about seeing an original painting - the only one of its kind - for a second time. A humbling reminder of how ephemeral life is.
I recently submitted my next round of paperwork required for my visa. It blows my mind that it has been two years since I began the long process of obtaining permanent residency in the US, and that one year of that has been spent in quarantine. Two years ago, America faced quite a different set of circumstances - we were (only) in the middle of Trump’s presidency, coming out of a government lock-down (remember that?!), pre-George Floyd, pre-Covid, pre-Weinstein being found guilty etc. etc. Unable to work or travel while my case was pending, I remember sitting at home waiting for my partner to come back from work, watching the Handmaid’s Tale. Here I am, two years later - new president, but still pending, stuck at home waiting for my partner to come back and watching the Handmaid’s Tale. I am two years ago! This is no time-turner magic, just a strange, regressive series of life events.
Last week also marked ten years since the death of a very close friend. The significance of ten years is really astounding to me; I feel as shocked by his death now as I did ten years ago. To have someone be such a central part of your life one minute, gone the next minute, and gone for ten years the minute after that - there is nothing more incomprehensible to me. When the days and weeks can sometimes feel so long… endless… I’m not really sure how ten years could have just vanished so quickly. I guess the pain of loss doesn’t ever go away with time, but neither do the memories that are so treasured. I am so very grateful, and feel so lucky, that I got to share some of his life.
In a recent conversation with a friend, one of us made the comment that time is not linear. I think this makes it difficult to understand and follow. We all try to make time fit into a formula, minutes/hours/days/weeks/years, but it’s just not so simple. There will always be good times and bad times, no matter how old we are, and so time will always move in different speeds and directions. What I find important is that with time comes change, and changes are so necessary! The last year has forced many of us to make big changes, and to adapt to them more quickly than we might have wanted to. Some of us relocated, changed careers, learned how to cook, re-examined our values and beliefs. Now we have the responsibility of creating good out of these changes, and to me, this feels exciting.
Some Interesting Things
In my last letter I didn’t have so many interesting things to share here, and today I think I have a surplus, so I will try and condense it down to the MOST interesting!
I was so touched by this story in the Modern Love series of the NY Times.
I’ve been listening to this extraordinary and sublime new album by Arooj Aftab on repeat. Do you ever listen to music and just can’t really believe what you are listening to is real, it is too beautiful? This is that. Her words about art in today’s world felt very meaningful to me;
”I think there's a way for artists to say something with their work that is not always very direct. It's not always like a social activism, but it is, you know, in its subtlety and its grace. It can just be there very [unimposingly].”This podcast, How Processed Food Companies Get Us 'Hooked' On Junk, which I heard first a snippet of on the radio and later listened to the full program, was very interesting.
I admire Mads Mikkelsen as an actor and now, after reading this profile of him for Vulture, feel like I know him a little better as a person.
Aislinn Nosky’s concert last weekend for The Atterbury House Sessions (created by Lara St John) was reinvigorating, gorgeous, and still has my imagination captured!
I can’t wait to see what we will all be like post-pandemic. This article from The Atlantic puts people into two categories; will you be Team Yes or Team Couch?
Cezanne said he painted nature not to copy it, but to realise his sensation of it.
I’m getting fed up with reading more and more accounts of how rich and powerful men abuse people. I’m NOT fed up with reading about strong and brave women identifying the problems in their industries, speaking openly about their personal stories, and supporting those with ‘more to lose’. Tavi Gevinson puts it so well in this article for Vulture, ‘Art Doesn’t Need Tyrants’.
Logan managed to make chocolate - from the bean! This video is really worth a watch.
To celebrate the brilliant writer, Vladimir Nabokov’s, birthday, which would have been on April 22nd (1899), The Paris Review publicised this interview, The Art of Fiction, originally published in 1967. What a character! By the way, have you read Pnin?
The world is crashing and burning all around us. I feel somewhat strange and idiotic for not mentioning any of the Earth’s huge catastrophes in this newsletter. At some point, I think I decided not to, that my extra voice was unnecessary to add to the noise, and that there are already some incredible and brave journalists reporting on each situation, whom we should follow. I thought that if I began to try and talk about each crisis as it deserved, I would quickly fall into a dark, deep hole. So, just know that I am aware, that my thoughts right now are focused on the situation in India, and I really hope things soon start to improve for the people in that remarkable country.
Thanks for reading. Lotsa love everyone.
